JOKE OF THE DAY: Who’s at Happy Hour?
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armoire1chic
A FASHION DESIGNER'S JOURNEY
A heavy-set fashion designer decided it was time for him to go shopping for more clothes. As he walked, he luckily found a time machine & thought that using it would offer him a wide variety of opportunities to discover much more in the fashion world!
While dreaming of what great things would await him, he went inside of it, set a time period, & then blasted off. His first stop was in Ancient Rome.
armoire1chic
There, he had noticed many people wearing such detailed & admirable clothing. He talked to people, & found out where they has bought their clothes from, and then walked into the famous shop. Since he was now sporting a larger size of clothing, he asked the boutique shop worker lady if he could order XL shirts for himself. The worker's behavior became awkward, so she quickly referred him to the shop's designer.
armoire1chic
The puzzled yet enthusiastic designer came out from the back office, & very nervously asked him: "Are you sure you want to buy that many shirts??"🤣🤣🤣
armoire1chic
MY PFF IS IN SHARE JAIL…
My PFF loves getting those blues so much that she maxed-out her numbers and got put into Share jail.
The latest word out about her is that she’s currently under investigation for her criminal ties!👔🤡🤣😂🤣
armoire1chic
WHY WORRY?
I know of a PFF who worries over everything and won't sell anything but certain athleisurewear brands.
She is very clothes minded.
Walking at least 20 minutes every day is good for you. Couple that with great fashion sense & you will not worry about having healthyshoes!
armoire1chic
THE PSYCHIC ENCOUNTER
A lady made a Posh bundle & then we got to talking. She revealed to me that she has psychic abilities and could give me much guidance. She then began her spiel, and immediately shocked me when she told me what she sees about one of my most personal matters without her ever having known me before. She said “You have an iron deficiency”. I was like, “Wow!! How did you know that??”, and she said “The clothes displayed in your listings are badly wrinkled!”👻🤣😂🤣😂
alhopki
@armoire1chic 😂
alhopki
@armoire1chic 😂
armoire1chic
COVID-19’s FASHION ECLIPSE
The 2020’s had to be the ugliest time in the fashion world, with people having some unusual extra wearables clashing with their fancy clothing. Most everybody was wearing surgical masks trying to protect themselves, and no one had any taste!🥁😷😛🍕🤣
armoire1chic
THE METRO EXPERIENCE
I went to a concert at The Metro venue on the north side of Chicago. Being from the more mainstream south-side of the city, I was delighted to see so many interesting & shocking people, bands, and different things. The best piece of art I saw up on the stage there was placed by an amazing drum set. It was this really cute & short statue of a little guy, having a clock in place of his belly. I guess you could say he was a metro gnome.
armoire1chic
They had an Avant-garde eclectic fashion show there that night, which ended tragically: a high fashion model (who came in from France & was famous for her outrageous wearables) died that night by crashing into the building as the show was going on! Rumor has it that she was running late for her catwalk debut there, and was racing to get there. She would only have been fashionably late, but instead, sadly, she was killed in bizarre fashion.
armoire1chic
THE METRO EXPERIENCE: PART 2
Arrangements have been made for the model's wake. She was so beautiful that her will was to forever be seen wearing her famous clothing line. She insisted on being permanently set on display in a glass casket, so, considering her bad accident and recent distortion, this remains to be seen... Others would argue to do as she wished because she had great jeans.
armoire1chic
Some say that the accident involved more than the wreck; she would have had more time on her hands if she didn't have to change attire. They may have to bring in a prosthetic limb to help her appearance, but they fear that anyone can pull this off. Her mother insists on keeping her wearing her famous clothing line for sales profits. She is very clothes minded.
armoire1chic
THE HIPPIE SELLER
I bought a pair of pants from a hippie seller who loves to repurpose clothing. I actually needed petite sized pants, but this pair was regular long & I wanted to do a good deed by buying pre-owned clothing, so I worked out a plan with this lady. She agreed to hem the pants and take them in for me to my specifications, since they were too long & wide for me as-is, or sew it seams. When I had received my order, I was disappointed to find that she had done a bad hem job!
armoire1chic
I had to ask her what had happened, & she said that at the time she was doing the work, she was extremely focused listening to her headphones, trying to be one with Tailor Swift...really a waist of time! The only thing left to do for pants was to go to a retailor. I told her I'd be going there, & all she could say to me was "suit yourself!"
armoire1chic
THE IMPRESSIVE CORSET
Ms. Kay was determined to blow everybody away at the cocktail party by showing up in a super-tiny corset. She envisioned herself fashionably walking in to this black-tie event while sporting a perfect hour-glass figure. She began with drinking a few rounds of wine. You could say that she got pretty waisted there! Some of the gals asked her if her waist was actually that tiny, and she replied "Of corset is!"
armoire1chic
She didn't think too much about having to breathe when planning this presentation, and eventually fainted. When she came to, she awoke to a kindly doctor helping her. It was discovered that she had been on a strict diet of heavily salted meats. The doctor said she was cured, but recommended that she switch to a vegan diet. She wouldn't have any beef with that, but she loves her seafood. Doc said ok, so as long as she doesn't feel too eel anymore.
armoire1chic
She was very hungry after all of this talk about food, and began pigging out. Dinner was served, & when given the butter, she took it & said "I'm on a roll now!" She made a mad dash to the ice cream bar, where was proud to make a beautifully perfect looking Sundae for herself. She gave credit of her talent to having attended Sundae school. She stood up, but tripped & fell. They watched it all unfold....
armoire1chic
MOSES & THE WANDERERS
Did you know that Moses was actually tech savvy? No way! YHWH! Just a bit...He was the very first person to use Control-C, but having wandered with his crowd to the rabbit hole (of all places with only Manna to eat) made him get disgusted with cursors. He actually named some computer hardware: he got an idea from the Wanderers not being able to bathe for long periods of time, hence, the name of the CPU. He had the first tablet connecting to the cloud, though!
armoire1chic
Someone heard him say that it's bad luck to be superstitious. He preached that Sunday was a Sabbath day of worship, and that the day before it was a Sadderday. The Wanderers began to plan ways to earn money selling clothes, but grew tired, and went to bed. That same night when everyone was asleep, magicians snuck into the shelter hut & played a trick on the wanderers by swapping out giant grasshoppers disguised as their mats. The next day, the Prophets were through the roof!
armoire1chic
ALL THINGS OF FALL
I'm dreading this shocking annoyance: it has been a long time since we've had to deal with static-cling of our clothes and hair from cold, dry weather, but change of seasons is now upon us, and I'm exstatic! (Rubbing up on aluminum foil helps stop that) With the holidays approaching, I look forward to sipping hot & tangy apple cider. Rumor has it that the apple cider had to apeel to the police because it got mugged. Only a cinnamon would have done that!
armoire1chic
The local pumpkin patch threw a party & gave an award to their most handsome scarecrow for being outstanding in his field. It has become popular to visit the graveyards at this time of year to commemorate the dead: they're dying to get in there.
armoire1chic
I've decided to be a ghost for Halloween this year, and the coolest costume I can buy is sold at the Bootique. The new $5.95 discount helps! The ghost costume I buy should be in pristine condition: if I were to wear out torn sheets, it would make me a holy terror. I will be shopping for just the right style, since I'm a serious bargain haunter, and the key to my success trick or treating is my spookey. You get what you give! Now we count down the days!👻Candy door open any quicker?🥸🏘️🎃🍬🍫🍭🍪🍬
armoire1chic
A dyslexic walks into a bra - oops! Reset...: A spool of string walks into a bar, & the bartender says “We don’t serve any string in here”. Upset, the spool of string rolls out of there, then around in the patio, but dares to go back in.
The bartender says “Aren't you that string I had just kicked out of here?”
The string says, "No, I’m a frayed knot!
armoire1chic
Another bartender walked into a bar and got a terrible headache! It was an iron bar. He still blamed it on not eating, & snuck into the field of a wheat farmer to gather some of it up for making bread, but the farmer saw him & yelled "They're mygrains!" Some say that headaches are fake because they're all in your head. Others get headaches just from getting out of bed to Posh. Next time, they should go feet first!
armoire1chic
…WALKS INTO A BAR…
title for the above two comments
armoire1chic
WHO’S AT HAPPY HOUR?
A lowballer with a parrot on her shoulder roller skates into a bar with a tall ladder. You could say that she's really a cheaps skate. She had heard that the drinks were on the house! She sent her parrot up to the roof to knock over as many drink glasses as possible. Alas! Now they were half off! This dive bar seems to be a magnet for people like this because the next guy who came in was hired to entertain the patrons as a cheap magician.
armoire1chic
He limits his show to only performing card tricks, since rabbits & props are way too expensive for him after he was robbed at the gas station. When the police asked him who did it, he said "Pump # 9!".
The bar staff had delegated a bookkeeper to be as frugal as possible, so being overworked with strict limitations, her job was to calculate payouts for all hired, but was only allowed to use one digit. She couldn't count on the others.
armoire1chic
A greedy baseball player showed up there after stealing a base, and a regular gambler would only play there with half of a deck of cards so that he could cut his losses. A miserly band played at this dive bar that night because they certainly couldn't handle big notes. The best part of the night was seeing that the bar tender was very proud of showing off his newly Poshed penny loafers!
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