UND'UN 1OF1 HANDPAINTED FLEATHER PARKA

Made from the finest Fleather in the cosmos. Imported from Fugazi di Bovino Fictioné, an ancient faux tannery in South Central Italy. Since 8,967 B.C.G.S.E. (Before Cam'Ron Got Shot Epoch), the Pinocchio family been making fake leather that is the truth. So real that if you pass a dairy farm wearing one, the bad cows will mean mug you and point finger guns, held sideways cos gangster, and the whole scene will be in slow motion and you'll think you're bout to get shot but really you're dreaming